Thursday, December 6, 2007

Right Now

Right now there is so much going on and I am trying to figure out how to sort it all, and where to put things.
First and foremost, Christmas is coming. I'm making three different types of candy to give as gifts. Two are different varieties of chocolate bark, one featuring roasted cashews, and dried cranberries and apricots, and the other with candied orange and walnuts. The last candy is a chocolate pretzel cup. Classic. I have to make myself a little "to do" list so I can get it all done on my day off tomorrow.
Along with Christmas, my trip to Yellowstone is also fast approaching. I leave in a week and a half, and I don't feel like I am the least bit ready! I bought snowy weather clothing, but I want to make another list to make sure I have everything I need! I keep thinking, "Do I need gloves? What about a scarf? Do I have one? Where are my boots? I don't have any socks!"

On a larger scale, I have been muddling over some big decisions. I need to do more with my career and education if I want to get where I want to go. If I want to work for the State Department, I need more under my belt than just a B.A. and two foreign languages. I need something BIG. I have decided I am going to either join the military or the Peace Corps. I'm going to apply for the FSO exam, and if it pans out, it pans out. However, I don't have very high hopes, so if they say no, I'm looking at the Air Force or Navy, or the Peace Corps. The Air Force takes care of their people, but are slow to promote. The Navy, on the other hand, has great leadership and good opportunities for language professionals. I don't want to spend my years in something I don't overly want to do sitting there like a lump on a log. I want to get things done. I want my time in the military to be useful. I kind of skated through college, doing ok, but I feel like I could have done more. I want to go to the DLI to be trained in Arabic or Farsi. I want my time to be well-spent, and rightfully so.
The Peace Corps wouldn't be such a bad idea, either. The experience I know would be incredible, no matter what I end up doing. It's run by the State Department, which is eventually where I want to be. The pay isn't great, which is the opposite of the military. I do think, though, it would change my life. I have a lot of research to do.
I also have a job I am looking at in Denver, also within the government with possibility of promotion. I just want a change, that's all. I feel restless. I can't wait tables forever. I can barely stand to do it another week.
No matter what, I think my life is pulling me away from something, away from someone that I am not sure I can let go of, even though I have no idea how it will work out.
I'll take an input anyone has to offer. In the meantime I am trying to relax so I can make a good decision.